6 Absolutely Outrageous Things I’ve Learned About Myself By Traveling Alone For Only 4 Days (You’re Never Going to Believe Number 2!)

I really didn’t want to start a blog. Mostly because every middle-class white girl studying abroad feels entitled to share which color macaroon she had today and frankly, I don’t really give a shit. But alas, I’m here to tell you about every strain of weed I tried in Amsterdam and flavor of Clif bar I’ve eaten as a meal replacement because I didn’t want to spend anymore Euros.

So I’m on my way to my second destination and I’m happy to say I survived the first (very tiny) leg of my trip. I left Minneapolis on the night of the Snowpocalypse and luckily it didn’t negatively affect my travels…quite the opposite actually! Since so many people didn’t make it to the MSP airport due to storms, I got to fly in first class which was an awesome start to the trip. I had some crazy good food, took some ZZZquil and fell asleep to Pitch Perfect 2. I woke up to the plane “preparing for landing,” the sun shining, and a lot of feelings like “what the fuck am I doing?”

The first thing I did when I made it to my hostel was got a beer. I had no idea what else to do and it was noon and there was a gaggle of guys hanging in the lobby and I didn’t know how to approach them without a drink in my hand. I got the beer and still didn’t approach them, although they did ask if I wanted to play pool… and I declined.

Eventually, a different guy approached me and asked if I was from the US since he recognized my accent. He was from California. He asked if I wanted to get lunch with him and his friend. I wasn’t sure if this was creepy or totally normal but I immediately said yes. They had been there for a few days so they showed me the ropes. We had lots of cheese samples and got big cold sandwiches that we ate while walking around the city. His friend, who he had also met at the hostel, was nuts. He was Portugese, loud, and hella goofy. After a few hours of romping around the city, we went back to the hostel to regroup in our rooms and were going to meet up. I never saw them again which is when I learned my first lesson about traveling alone: you have to be fine really getting to know someone and then never seeing them again.

This is totally the opposite of what Minnesotans do. We spend our entire life building a core group of friends that we are very protective and supportive of. I had to shake that really quickly, let my walls down, and become okay with just enjoying moments with people rather than building long-lasting friendships.

I then met 2 of my bunk mates. We went out to dinner at “Pasta Pasta” so I could get my noodle fix, shared some wine, and then hung back at the hostel. My hostel was basically a frat house so there wasn’t really any reason to leave at night.

I won’t get into too much detail about the next few days. There was a lot of wandering by myself during the day and drinking at the hostel at night. I went to a photography museum, did 2 different walking tours, got shit on by a bird, you get the gist.

Despite this pretty long post, I figured this blog would mostly be quick tidbits or pictures. I don’t want it to be a diary. I figured I could also do some listicals cuz thx Buzzfeed. Oh, and I was recently watching a Shark Tank episode where Mark Cuban told one of his sharks that she needed to write more valuable content like listicals. So thx Mark Cuban and Buzzfeed and all my fellow Millenials who hate reading. So here is my first short listical:

1. You have to be fine really getting to know someone and then never seeing them again #

Yeah. I already said that. But hey, it also never hurts to know people all over the world, especially if you’re planning to travel again.

2. Homesickness is a real thing #

This probably sounds pathetic coming from someone who’s been gone 4 days but I felt the homesickness HARD the 2nd day. Yeah, the 2nd day. I walked around the city by myself and couldn’t stop thinking that this whole trip was a bad idea. There are couples everywhere which made me wish Spencer was with me. After a long day outside I just wanted a private shower and a private bed to relax in. But hey, white people problems. I got over it.

3. Being in a committed relationship and traveling solo are not a real thing, apparently #

I assume this is how my freshman roommate felt having a boyfriend that went to a different college while we all had one-night stands. Everyone at my hostel was single as can be and ridiculously down to party. When I casually brought Spencer up in conversation they were totally shocked that I had a boyfriend that was back home. This doesn’t really matter to me, I just found it interesting. Kathleen and Ross did it so we can too, dammit!

4. Meeting people is easy and fun! #

I was really concerned about meeting people since I’m traveling alone and hate talking to strangers, but I figured I could always resort to getting quite tipsy alone and then approaching someone in the hostel. This works, sure. My favorite people I met in Amsterdam though, were my bunk mates and people I met on a free walking tour I attended. Since it is such a touristy area, nearly everyone is willing to chat about where they’re from and where they’re going. I also got noticeably better at approaching people within just 2 days at the hostel. There are plenty of people traveling alone so it’s easy.

5. Beware of the spotlight effect #

I’ve always loved this phenomenon and I keep reminding myself of it while traveling because it helps me not give as many shits when I’m stressed out. If you’re not aware, Wikipedia describes it as “the phenomenon in which people tend to believe they are noticed more than they really are.” When put in these uncomfortable, touristy situations it is impossible not think “everyone is staring at me,” “everyone knows I’m lost,” “everyone thinks I’m awkward,” etc. But the good news is- they aren’t! They don’t! When in doubt, just find someone who is more lost or more awkward because they definitely exist and you didn’t even realize it. No one cares about you in these situations and that’s a good, no, a great thing.

6. Being alone is liberating and stressful at the same time #

The first day was obviously scary but mostly liberating. I like being alone so I was really looking forward to this trip. The 2nd day got harder though, as I mentioned above. We’ll see how Berlin is, but in Amsterdam I was always struggling with wanting to be alone but feeling like I should be around other young people since the hostel was full of them. FOMO, if you will. By the last day I was fine saying “fuck it, I feel like being alone and walking around, I don’t care what other people are doing today"…which felt really good.

That’s all for now. My train is arriving in Berlin in less than an hour and I’m amped to find a solid beer and like…a big soft pretzel or something.

Tschüss!